i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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