Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
