Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
How does it feel to date your dad?
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