I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
