Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i think i have two assholes
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
