I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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