We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
