I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
