i may or may not be watching the land before time
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
