peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
