Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
