You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
