Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
