Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
