new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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