She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
