he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
