Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
