Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
