As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Randomize