I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
