She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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