I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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