Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
My penis needs a shock collar
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
