i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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