But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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