I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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