I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Randomize
