Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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