Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
