please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
