is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize