Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
