Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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