Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
