Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Randomize
