Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You made out with two different species that night
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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