The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
