On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
