Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
The beer is more important than you right now.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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