Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Congratulations! We have a period
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