where does the pee come out of this thing
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize
