At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
