i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
