I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Is Oprah even human
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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