I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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