Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Randomize
