where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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