And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
being pregnant is like rehab
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
