Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
So many bounce houses so little time
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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