we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
